I used to obsess with being the kind of man that SHE wanted so I could GET her, whoever she was.
"What do women want in a man?"
"What kind of man do I need to be so she rips my clothes off?!"
The problem is that SHE doesn't want a man who wants to be what she wants. She wants a man who is unapologetically HIMSELF first. Even if she tries to change him, he must be willing to walk away if she pushes too hard.
So when men ask me now, "What does she want?!"
I say, "It doesn't matter. Don't worry about what she wants. What she really NEEDS is for YOU to be who YOU want."
And the best way to be who you want, is to get excited about what you can become! Who you want to BE.
Becoming Who You Are is Easy Work
The good news is that when you make a plan to become the kind of guy you TRULY want to BE, to be something compelling to you, that MEANS something to you... then you'll find that change doesn't really feel like work.
You'll look FORWARD to making amazing changes in your life, if you are moving towards something you are PASSIONATE about, something that gets you EXCITED, every day.
Because that's what's really important when you're working on becoming more, and you're getting pulled away from your goals by work, people, or other obligations, you'll keep that appointment with yourself because it REALLY matters to you, it's something you really love to do.
So the kind of man you choose to be is the kind of man you'd LOVE being. Someone you'd be passionate about becoming.
Trying to Get Something Is HARD Work
What you don't want to be is the kind of man who simply tries to "get laid", or that "women just love" or what you think she would want in a man.
Or if you just go to the gym because it's something you HAVE to do, it's not going to work well for you because it's not coming from that place inside you that gets you really excited.
Because now you're trying to DO something, instead of "Being" the man you're supposed to be, and you'll get easily distracted by your phone, tv, video games or porn. You'll say "I'll do it later."
What She Wants is Your Unapologetic Self
And if you can stay in the "Being" of who you truly are, "Being Your Unapologetic Self" the guy that YOU know, and that YOU love. You won't be able to stand wasting time on the things that don't further your vision. That's going to be the guy that she'll love.
The guy she truly wants.
When you can stay in that "Being" of your compelling vision that you are developing, and succeeding, that kind of man you are passionate about being, you'll walk right through her barriers, and she'll seek YOU out.