Men think that money, a handsome face, confidence, and muscles are what really attract a woman.
This really is only a small part of the bigger picture here. Did you know that what is really attractive in a man is exceptionally rare? Well in this video, I'm going to reveal to you the real reason women choose some men over others, and why they STAY with these few men and dump the rest.
Why She Leaves
If you ask any typical woman why she leaves her boyfriend or husband you'll probably hear..."Well, we just fell out of love." and to most guys, they say, "Hey that makes sense, she just didn't love him anymore." But if you keep asking her why she left him you'll eventually come to the real answer, which is: he wasn't in control of his life.
And what do I mean by that?
Well... it means that he didn't have a compelling direction or a vision for his and her lives together and he wasn't following through with it. He never had it or he lost the direction that was meaningful to him. Most women won't directly say that he's going nowhere in his life. They will say something more akin to, "We just didn't match well."
You'll see this play out over and over again. You may see her go after the bad boy because he's got these externally sexy things, but soon she realizes his life is a mess and he's going nowhere.
It's like when you are dating that dramatic hairdresser. Guys do the same thing. Sure she's hot, but holy shit her life is a mess. If you had the choice between a few crazy hot women or a bunch of unattractive disloyal and boring women trying to tie you down, you'd probably pick the hairdresser.
You see, she doesn't stay with the bad boy either, not really.
You might say, "Hey! I'm a great guy! But as soon as we start dating it goes stale, or she goes silent!" Exactly, you had something in the beginning that she liked, but she quickly found out there was little for her to keep her interest.
And 9 times out of 10 it's because the guy isn't conscious of himself or the direction he's going in his life.
A man without a plan, in her eyes, is no man at all.
A man without a plan, in her eyes, is no man at all.
She Has Only ONE Good Opportunity
You see, guys can start a family over and over again. You're fertile and viable all the way until the day you die.
She's got, at best, 20 good years of childbearing available to her. She can't afford to mess it up. She's got to find THE BEST MAN SHE CAN to commit to and have a family with. Most of this is not always in her conscious awareness.
The closer she gets to 40 the more pressure she's biologically feeling. Sure, in her early 20s she may feel like she's got all the time in the world, she won't want to start a family. She may even date many guys, even though most women would rather find the right guy early on and put all that effort and dating behind them sooner rather than later.
The opportunity that she's looking for is the guy that's going places in his life. The guy who's conscious of himself, his thoughts, his emotions, and ultimately his actions. This is why she says, "Where are all the good guys!?" Because most guys can't or unwilling to do the hard work of becoming a guy worth following.
You, on the other hand, can be with many women, you can start a family, fuck it up, and do it all over again with another woman. We see this play out all the time in society, while she's raising kids as a single mother who spurns her ex for not being what she wanted him to be by keeping his kids from him. She uses the only tools she believes she has to get him to change.
Sometimes she's blaming him for her bad choice. Sometimes it's because he's lost or never had his vision.
Sure you may be a morally good guy, but you're not the kind of good guy she's looking for. She needs a man that's going places in his life and won't let anyone knock him off track, not even her. Even if she pushes hard too hard!
You are in a competition and you MUST be her best opportunity.
Your Vision Is What She Wants
When you clearly define your vision, your principles, to be the kind of man YOU want to be, unapologetically, suddenly dating options start to open up to you that weren't available to you before. You'll realize that her beauty is only a feature to initially attract men like you.
You'll see how all women are looking for a man, with a worthwhile vision, whose life they can be a part of. How they are all shuffling around competing for these top men.
Some women want a stoic man to keep them grounded and is good with his hands. Some women need a man who makes extra money so they can feel financially secure. Some women may need a man who's outgoing and can build a community around himself so they feel taken care of. Each woman is a bit different in what they need in a partner.
But ALL women want a man who's going somewhere in his chosen vision. They want to feel proud and be inspired by him. They want to feel proud to have had his children.
She must feel validated EVERY DAY that she made the right choice.
The cool thing is that your vision doesn't even have to be realized. Because we never reach perfection, and when we meet our goals we define new ones.
Your vision doesn't have to be realized for her to want to be with you. You must simply be on the path.
Your Vision Is What YOU Need
It's easy to look at this compelling vision and say, "Why would I do this just to get a woman?!" Simple. You don't.
You see, you do it for YOU. Her being attracted to you and your vision is simply a side effect of doing what you should be doing as a masculine-identified man.
As a masculine-identified man, you're going to feel empty and have a hole in your life if you aren't doing something inspiring and compelling to you.
Most men think this hole will be filled with a woman in their life. So they mistakenly think that their relationship with her is the most important thing to focus on in his life. This is reinforced by society telling him he should treat her like a princess, or a queen. The problem is yes, she will feel special. In the beginning. This novelty will soon wear off when she discovers he has no real vision for their life together.
She will feel that her initial attraction for him was misplaced. She will start to naturally withdraw when she feels he isn't going anywhere. She will start to lose attraction.
At this point, the man, who only focuses on keeping this woman because he has a hole in his life that he feels only a woman can fill, will try harder to get her back. He won't understand why she's moving away from him. So he tries harder and harder, and she moves further and further away...because he just doesn't get it.
When he makes her his compelling vision, he's not focusing on his, which means he's not going anywhere in his life, which means she can't stay with him. The harder he tries to get her back, the further he pushes her away.
But if you follow YOUR compelling vision, it will not matter what women come and go in your life. You'll have fulfillment, you'll have built something compelling, and you'll be WAY happier to know that your happiness isn't defined by somebody else's constantly shifting emotions. You'll feel more confident that you're succeeding in life, and you'll be doing things that make YOU happy.
Following your vision, getting outside of your comfort zone, fighting for the life that YOU want, breaking past your barriers and becoming your best self IS the essence of masculine energy. As iron sharpens iron so you must become forged by your willingness to take the world head-on.
When you consistently follow your compelling vision, you become confident, you become secure, you produce money, you may even look incredibly healthy and muscular. So you see, women do want these things...on the surface, but they are just a side effect of a man following his compelling vision.
Your vision fulfills you, and as a result, attracts her.
Interested in producing your own compelling vision? We go through that in great detail in the MOAB coaching program. If you're interested in being a part of the coaching program, start by watching this free video.
Remember to stay unapologetically you.